Evolution of parenting

Evolution of parenting

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Raise your hand if you think parenting has changed profoundly in recent years. There is an evolution in parenting ways. Science started focusing on childcare and parenting ways quite recently. Maybe it was wars or changing technology or revolutions of past centuries or a composite of all that made us think about the best ways to raise a child.

The responsibility of nurturing a healthy and happy child is becoming overwhelming for parents. We all look for expert parenting advice, books, classes to grip on the best possible solution. Not to forget about the unsolicited advice offered every now and then that adds on the pressure.

Does this make you wonder why is it so challenging to be the parent today? What changed in the past few decades? Or was it always so hard? And how did our grandparents survive with half a dozen or more kids?

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To think of it in past century science made its way to our homes. Not just we got electricity or water from taps, we moved from messenger birds to compact smartphones quite rapidly. Our grandparents were talking about growth in population, partition, war, unemployment and our parents started to explore job opportunity outside the homeland. Globalization had just started then. The ’70s – 90’s kid saw how home got upgraded from bicycle to scooter and cars, kitchens got a grinder, living rooms added television sets. The economy bloomed. The world around us changed rapidly. Before we realized our parenting styles also changed.

Most of our Indian grandparents lived in a village as a large joint family. Many still do. When a child was born there was practically a village to raise the child. They never dreamt the food that they ate then would be sold as healthy-organic food in fancy markets and their grandchildren, now a parent would seek for it. Neither they thought of vaccines that would save their babies. Today’s parent debate over painless vaccination, which actually is not. Our parent’s generation unknowingly joined the revolution of powder milk -Dabba milk. For long many strongly believed the potential goodness of formula milk much higher than breastmilk. The misconception is still at large.

Parenting just evolved from our grandparents’ times. Today we talk about equality in every aspect in career, home and definitely parenting. Fathers are more involved in parenting. It is no longer expected to be just a mother’s job. Meanwhile, parenting has become a choice for some slices of society. Going child-free is not exactly accepted openly but is considered now.

So, does it make the parenting job easier? Does a parent feel empowered with choice, education, finance, lifestyle, little awareness etc? If you think positively yes, think harder.

Parenting starts from conception. Agree or not science has helped us. The well-being of fetus is monitored, actions are taken for most medical hitches, which was unthinkable years ago. But then there are also disagreements of saving baby’s cord blood. Then comes the birth of a child(ren), moms are judged bluntly if C-section happens. It is a struggle to escape the clutches of breastfeeding vs bottle-fed. Oh, you joined the job after baby vs why you quit that job. New-Dads get quizzical look upon changing soiled diapers. Poor fathers care is critiqued as a babysitter, while they were just parenting. Again, the mental health of a mother is compromised often.

When a new parent’s choice is subjected to societal grill, then is it really easy to raise a happy healthy child. Adding to peer pressure the market targets them. According to a study, it is excepted by 2020 the mother-childcare hospital market in India to be $27 billion. Indian baby care market is booming exponentially with little hurdles.

New-age parents are not spoiled by choices rather they are more confused. They are unsure about what exactly to feed, what to watch and whatnot, where to play, whom to talk, which form of school, the list goes on.

Thinking of this, our parents learned from their parent’s mistakes, so did we. Remember how the gentle parenting slipped into our mind as we hold our newborn. Our parents, in most cases, believed it was okay to hit the child to discipline. In an era with accessibility to information, ideas, theories are we diving into parenting with fear. Fear, if the child would be successful and happy. Are we slowly moving to a time of over-parenting? Micromanaging life of kids. Okay, newborns are dependant on us but this dependence should turn into independence as they grow. Is shielding them for harms of the world bringing out any good?

Long story short, how are we going to raise a child who is happy, happy inside-out, can bounce back from adversity, independent yet bonded with parents, confident and curious. All at the same time.

Recently a study was conducted on Child-wellbeing index in India, stating the dimensions on healthy individual development, positive relationships, and protective contexts. Children are the future of the world and as parents, we are the first teachers shaping them. We, parents, can not turn external factors related to well being yet a major portion can be impacted by us. Especially in the early years.

Stay glued as this September as we take you on a conversation about “Dilemma faced by modern parents in early years of childhood”.

I am taking my blog to the next level with Blogchatter’s #MyFriendAlexa.


Disclaimer – Picture source Photo by Kenny Krosky on Unsplash

86 thoughts on “Evolution of parenting”

  1. So true. The times have changed indeed. What our parents and their parents had for food, is being labelled as organic, fresh from Earth, and all sorts of fancy labels. Even I’m apprehensive though I still have a long way to go before I can even think of parenthood. Great post. Found you through #MyFriendAlexa.

  2. Parenting has changed big time, and the major reason is social media and the internet. If anything happens we first check things on Google and then ask our elders. I believe in one thing what our grand parents and parents suggest or tell is the best for our kids.

    • Dimple probably a good part of parents today want to rely on handy information on internet over consulting elders on some traditional ways. Sadly, the information is half baked.

    • Very true. The parenting these days have really changed a lot. Parents trust google more than reaching out to their elders about any issue for their kids. Though my kid is fortunate enough to have both pairs of his grandparents always available for him. & i believe in trusting them more than google for sure.

  3. Parenting really changed a lot from time and years, the main reason may be wide spread knowledge and sources available..before it was just from the elders advice!!

  4. The blog neatly sums up the historical aspects of development of parenting practices over the last century or so. While I agree that parenting has become complicated with modern choices and development of technology, I have a sense that the “old school parenting” still has value and will always have so. While the techniques, tools and procedures might change the underlying intangible values of parenting remain the same and I sincerely feel while we embrace the new at the same time we should be grounded in the values which we derive from our moral compass and culture. As a parent of two growing kids including one who just stepped into teens, I can say it with a degree of immodesty that most of the fog around parenting choices are cleared when one sees things from the perspective of values. Happy raising kids!

    • Yes, fathers are also more involved in parenting nowadays. It is not only the mother’s job alone.

      I am not a parent but in my opinion, this makes parenting easy because when a couple together takes a decision, the chances are very low that the decision is bad for the child😊

    • Agree, the core of parenting hasn’t changed over time. Values are the end-goal to incorporate. Just the ways and external variables are dominant with the current generation of parents. Thank you for sharing your unfiltered thoughts, Sir. 🙂

  5. What a wonderful article. Being at the cusp of the old and new generation, it is forever a conflict in adopting the parenting principles to raise a well balanced child. Mostly one has to unlearn the teachings of the old generation at times to adopt new and upcoming methods. Thanks for writing such a wonderful article and one that covers every detail.

  6. Parenting is the toughest topic

    I am saying it by my experience

    But how easily you handle it and express your opinion seamlessly

    My friend it’s very informative post

    Thank you

  7. I agree. We are going over board here. Parenting is very easy and simple.. we tend to get into competition and expectations with screws everything for us.. looking for more. #damurureads

    • I have to say parenting is not easy, the long endless nights taught me that hard way but yes avoiding burden of expectations do make the situation better.
      Thanks for sharing your view Urvashi

  8. Brilliant piece. In the evolving world of technology, we have forgotten what it is to raise a happy child. A grandparents lap is always expected to be a safety net, one that protects a child from the scolding of the parents. Unfortunately, we live in times of rat race with minimal intention to nurture emotions. And that’s what we end up passing on to them very sadly.

  9. You have penned it down so beautifully Pragnya.. Parenting has definitely changed over years.. There are both positives and negatives. Our fathers were never involved in day to day activities, like the fathers are involved these days, which is a positive. On the other hand, what our elders used to say about food, nutrition and so many other things was much better when we were growing up!
    Looking forward to your next post.
    #simritreads #myfriendalexa

    • Parenting indeed has changed over the years. But I feel it’s more because of our lifestyle and medical advancement. I don’t say that our elders were wrong but the needs of the present day kids are changing and so is the environment. I do rely on their age-old practices for some things but for others I like to follow my own instincts with a little help from Google Baba and my paediatrician. Thanks for such an insightful post.

  10. It does take a village to raise a child. parenting has changed over the generations and it is nice to see Fathers take part in the joys of child raising. parents need to give importance to character building and over-all personality development for a well-rounded child. #MyFriendAlexa #RitecontentReads

    • You got me here Brinda. The next post in the series is about the village needed in raising a child. :)Can’t agree more with the role of father in child’s development

  11. Absolutely agree, Pragnya. From parenting style to dressing up to food items, things have changed to every possible extent. I loved how minutely you have observed and penned these points, looking forward to reading more.

  12. This is amazing Pragnya. Our thoughts resonate a lot and what i particularly loved abut your blog are the tits bits u have compared from our grandparents era to our’s. How we have labelled the food as organic, how we believe in gentle parenting… but everything said, i still believe that inspite of all the knowledge through social media kids aren’t being raised right. There is a mad race of who is the best parent and it’s more stressful. I remember my granny used to say that “Bache toh pal jate hai. Your generation goes finicky about everything.” somewhere she was right. we are realising it and better late than never. Looking forward to more of ur blogs.

  13. Nice post , it’s true that the total concept and ways have changed in past few decades , we are more concerned about kids emotional well being which was not even thought of during past decade.

  14. Liked your style of writing Pragya. This is an insightful post. You have pointed out the facts of modern parenting. And yes, fathers are playing a good role too now.Truly the idea of parenting has changed.

  15. Nice theme to choose for Alexa campaign Pragnya. Loved the comparision to the grand parents era. Yes, all said and done, they are going to say, these kids doesnt even know how to raise children in a total disdain. Its become a rat race sort of thing to prove yourself and your kid the best among peers, cousins, what not.

  16. Yes true said, times have changed, thinking has changed, Fathers are more involved and this positive change is accepted worldwide. Parenting certainly has evolved for good
    I was always amused how our grand and great grand parents had bunch of kids….. The future parents are more aware and more concerned for minutest things for their kids.
    My kids are lucky to stay with there grandparents and I love all the values and traditions they are telling and giving to my kids. Having elders experienced advice by your side is a blessing.

  17. You have actually touched a very grey area. Whenever I think about starting a family, I am torn between my parent’s generation’s idea of parenting and our idea of parenting. I see flaw in both of them and I don’t really want to be a part of it. I loved this article how it has talked about both. Thanks.

  18. New-age parents are not spoiled by choices rather they are more confused.This is so aptly said! As a mum to twins I know how I have to sometimes stop to compare them. Its a difficult task, and I am hope that I succeed in raising a good child.
    #myepicareads #MyFriend Alexa

  19. So true! Not a parent yet, not even married, but when i see parents and kids around and how different kids are, I mean it get’s difficult to understand which way is right and which way of parenting is wrong. It’s a huge question mark these days. I feel everyone has a unique way but what if that unique way is wrong?

  20. Parenting has always been a debatable topic and it always will be. I have observed in my lifetime as child, grandchild and now as a mother… that the elder generation is never completely satisfied with how the parents nurture their children. There is always a mixed bag of advice on parenting ready for us. Some are useful and some seem redundant in current times. Maybe when we grow old, we will also be talking about Do’s and Don’ts about parenting to our children.
    But yes, I feel the current parent generation has been sandwiched between how they were brought up and how they are now supposed to raise their kids. It is a phase of Transition due to so much of information (more like opinions) available through every media on how to nurture kids.
    As you rightly said…it has indeed made the new-age parents more confused. What is the correct way of parenting?… is a million dollar question today

    Loved your thoughts on the topic.
    #readbypreetispanorama for #MyFriendAlexa

    • Love your thoughts Preeti. Yes, today’s generation is sandwiched and every era’s parents are judged by the previous one. The right way is indeed a million dollar question.

  21. That’s so true, from food to bringing up our kids things had changed a lot, we believe to look for google if we need any information rather then going to elders for any help. Time changed everything

  22. I read your blogs and wonder how beautifully you write every blog posts!! I am an admirer of your writing style, truly. While reading I went back my childhood to recollect the memories I made with my parents. Thanks for this awesome post.. simply brilliant! 🙂

  23. This is such a lovely post pragnya, you have penned down a lot in this, and to be very honest this is what i have realised more after i became a parent myself. the way our parents used to raise us was totally different and i am not saying that we are not doing it correctly or something., it is just that we like this generation of parents are overprotected a little. I totally agree to my inlaws or my parents when they, ” hum to aise krte the” i respect and sometimes i tried to do what they did and it works too.

  24. This post talks so much to me. I am one of those confused father not sure about things but I am educating myself. Thank you for this post. I will keep coming back to your blog to read more. Thank you once again.

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